Holly: Rachel, you suck! Oh my god, you’re like a total drag. Has anyone ever told you that?
Puck: I have.
— The Substitute
Finn: Wait, who says it’s gonna be over?
Mercedes: Please. You think Puck or Santana are even gonna acknowledge my existence once we’re not in Glee Club together anymore?
Puck: …She has a point.
- Journey
Finn: I think we really came together this week as a team.
Puck: Yeah a gay team. A big gay team of dancing gays.
- Preggers
YO, YOU GUYS ARE CRUNCHY TOAST. Just broke 1,000 followers so it’s obvs time to party. Who’s got the Natty Lite????
Puck: I’m just saying she has a point. You are kind of an idiot.
Finn: Nice support, dude. Whatever happened to bros before hoes?
- Wheels
Quinn: I thought you wanted to be with me.
Puck: I do. Like a lot. But you haven’t given it up to me since the night I knocked you up, and baby, I’m a dude. I have needs.”
- Hairography
“Chicks don’t have prostates. I looked it up.”
- Pilot
Puck: He doesn’t belong here.
Finn: You joined Acafellas, what’s the difference?
Puck: I’m a stud, dude. I could wear a dress to school and people would think it’s cool.
- Preggers
“Well call the Vatican, we got ourselves another immaculate conception!”
- Preggers
Click through for full.
“Buenos nachos, Mr. Shue.”
- Showmance
